this dog.

it’s debatable who actually saved who.

quin, short for mom’s maiden name quinlan, is an everyday christmas morning gift kind-of-gift. i could never have imagined the most fun daily adventures and the deepest level of love and companionship.

anddd let’s be honest, the everyday coaxing of “tinkles and poopydoops.”

happiest holidays!!! from our little love.

never judge a book by it's cover.

enough time has passed, that i feel i have collected my thoughts. more importantly, i have the ability to acknowledge all that i have learned.

on may 18, 2014 my new boyfriend and i were walking home after dinner/drinks with my coworkers. we were held up. we were robbed. and i was pistol-whipped. unconscious for almost 24 hours. TBI.

i woke up in a room of loved-ones, that perpetually makes me teary-eyed. they comforted me. they advocated for me. they loved me.

career immediately on the breaks, focus became a slew of therapies that i knew nothing about. simple things became firsts. remembering three objects. standing on one foot. managing my own schedule. holding conversation. waitingroomafterwaitingroom. typing. texting. and taking the T.

until i was able to graduate therapies, get back to work full time, and ultimately live again, i never thought i was impaired. people don’t think that there is anything wrong with themselves. they lack an awareness that has a verrrrrrrrrry long road ahead, with an equal measure of pot holes, bikers and city traffic. learn as much as you can about yourself. have patience. have empathy. have human strength.

clichés or not, ‘life is short.’ ‘regret nothing.’ ‘don’t burn your bridges.’ ‘actions speak louder than words.’ 'time will tell.' ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.’

i am living proof of all of these. and more.

‘live!’

dear diary,

today i tried really hard.

wished a loved-one well, for an upcoming hurdle.

dreamed.

allowed my heart to feel for rosie o'donnell. anddd donald trump.

let a family member know i was thinking of them.

learned from a gigantic mistake at work.

felt comfort with my mom's presence.

met a friend half-way.

today, i did my best.

until next time,
patrick

#brotherscorcoran

stars aligning, we're able to get together once a year. the three of us are so fortunate to have only two years apart from each other, but we couldn't be hella different from one another. we are family. (cue) i got all my bruthas wit me.

these vacations are also an opportunity to see my mom again through both of them:

greg: uber punctual, the handiest, little bit uva' bahston accent and can talk with seriously ANYONE.
chris: mad hosting skills, ridic hardworking, 'clean-as-you-go' nature and every kiddie's best friend.

we definitely don't see each as often we'd like, but it's a guarantee for a really good time. like, so many laugh lines - next year, let's get botox!


*sorry i was such a tattle tale growing up, but now i work in HR  ...  so it really worked out for me.*

judgment.

as closing arguments have rest, bostonian’s aren’t sure what to feel. nothing could possibly ease the minds and memories of what once happened during the boston marathon.

each of us have been, or directly know someone who has been, to boylston st., memorial drive, MIT, and watertown. or even ran the boston marathon. let’s make an effort to be nice to one another. i’m not talking ‘buy the person behind you a cup of coffee’, i’m talking smiling, thank you’s, and awareness of others’ space and property.

whatever is meant to happen to dzhokhar tsarnaev, i can only hope that he has realized that actions have consequences. however severe. this side or the other. 

my best friend's engagement

a bar. the office. a blind setup. dating websites. or even unmentionable apps. 

our ability to meet more people has advanced significantly with technological help. 2009 was a big year for me, as i couldn't wait to move downtown boston (from the suburbs.) i was addicted to match.com and okcupid in order to meet more people. i quickly became interested in this cool guy that seemed to have his shit together - plus he was kind of handsome. in an eddie bauer sort of way. family, career aspirations and even mutual friends were all chatted over a couple of dinners and drinks.

an amazing friendship was created and i literally don't know what my life would be like if he wasn't a text away. he has supported me through just short of everything and even tells me (and anyone in earshot) when i look a little 'puffy.'

you never know what type of relationship may evolve when you meet someone. i am beyond lucky to wish my best friend a happy engagement.  i look up to you and your happiest journey!!!

things my 30 something self would like to say to my 20 something self.

• the hot guy you are lusting after is wayyyy more screwed up than you think (you are). 
• family is so everything. 
• the world really won't end if you publicly fall and ruin everything you are wearing. 
• tell your friend she may have something revolutionary, a gluten allergy. 
• purchase snow removal equipment and a small to medium sized empty property. 
• don't take on others' crap. but do learn more about yours. 
• it gets better. 
• others won't make you happy. you make you happy. 
• fung wah? are you kidding???
• oprah doesn't rule the world, starbucks does. 
• moisturize. everywhere. 

self study

instinctively, i've always used humor as a defense mechanism.

take the other day. i completely ate the sidewalk in front of all the 9am commuters in boston's financial district and before anyone could even ask if i was alright, i got up, and screamed "SAFE!"

things like that.

as of late, i have really paid attention to the "man, i wish i had done that differently." one of the many things that i appreciate about new year's with my friends is that we all say what we'd like to work towards in the upcoming year. mine for 2015 was not to immediately grab on to the self-deprecation, in order to make others feel less awkward. i may not be a bodybuilder, but i am a really strong person. emotionally.

the next time i ass plant, i am gonna enjoy it goddamit.